A Big Taj Thank You!
Stay tuned for next month’s issue of the Bent Pylon. At press
time we were still awaiting some outstanding invoices to finalize
our donation for the Ronald McDonald House of Dayton. Look for Ronald,
some Girl Scouts, a list of all the volunteers, and a BIG FAT CHECK
in the next issue.

We didn’t cheat…
I SWEAR!
“The food was better than good, the cars were super, even
the Complaint Department Girl was seen smiling. The trophies were
cool, but we didn’t cheat. The results were audited…
honest.” said an unnamed Schardt spokesperson. This was the
flimsy excuse given to Events Officials after the Schardt family
suspiciously spirited away three different Best of Class Awards
at the 2002 Taj Kreuzer. “I don’t know why everybody
is giving us a hard time. Ric Zimmerer registered his ‘67
Shelby and didn’t bring it. For Cripe’s sake he’s
the Prez! I think he must have heard about that ‘32 Street
Rod and pupped out in the Porsche® Wannabe Class. I’m not lying,
call him, his number is on Page Two of the Bent Pylon.” Dave
Schardt opined.
“If you really want to kick some tires, ask that fat, old,
white haired, big butt guy running the show who stole my dad’s
golf cart. If anybody had a butterfly ballot it had to be him. He
returned the cart but it was on empty, there were pork rinds and
Bud Lite cans everywhere.” Mr. Schardt fumed.
Click here for complete list of winners.
Taj Officials have reviewed the results with our accounting firm:
Dewey, Cheatum & Howe, and are satisfied that the only cheaters
at the event was Paul Loubier and Dick Weiss. Dick swears it was
a misunderstanding and Paul said his tee shirt didn’t fit
again.
TWENTY PLUS 356’S !!!!!
What a turn out of 356’s at the 2002 Taj Kreuzer. Twenty of
the one hundred and ten jewels from Stuttgart to participate in
the event at the beautiful Carillon Park were those built before
1965. They braved terrible temperatures and uncertainty as they
came from all over the area and then some. The projected snow accumulation
never materialized and many came topless. Fortunately the women
and children were kept close to the conservative few with bras.
Fred Uhlmann would never be caught without his prosthesis and Dick
Weiss had been seen sashaying around with one on as well.
The Dickster was caught on film attempting
to abscond the Best of Class award. Easily identified, he was directed
to park his Carrera in the penalty box with Ed Mauer who couldn’t
find victory circle with MapQuest. Most of those who attended were
real ladies and gentlemen and excepted the Schardt family run-away
with humility, grace and blood oaths of revenge. Some of the more
well intentioned attendees included Jim Perrin, Jon Vargas, Ken
Haselwander, Mike Robbins, Glenn Jividen, Marty Huelsman, Rob Ellis,
T Zombeck and Kathie Hunter, Ron Jones, Tom Oether, David Jones,
Bob Bryant, and the aforementioned guys with the man melon protectors.
Once again, thanks to all of you bathtub
aficionados who helped make this an event to remember. We were using
the arrest warrants to publish the names of attendees of merit and
we apologize for those of you we failed to mention. You are free
on your own recognizance.